Meditation or Physical Exercise...Which Type Are You?
I’ve never gravitated towards meditation or forced stillness (I know, I know, it would be really good for me). I’m not sure if my resistance to is a combination of stubbornness and fierce independence, or what I learned at home.
My parents, Israeli immigrants, had a treadmill in our basement, and my mother still drives to the JCC for vigorous workout classes. My father was a star athlete, the winner of the Israeli Olympics at Shot put at age 17. I’ve always had my father’s stamina (not his coordination), and as a tomboy growing up as the middle of three girls, I was the designated sporty type too, and very competitive. Running, biking, a mean game of Ping-Pong or tennis, and dancing the night away to techno or pop-80s were the kinds of physical activity I enjoyed.
I tried Yoga when I lived in LA, naturally, but preferred the spin classes (now prettified with a new title, “Soul Cycle”), high-speed stationary biking to the beat of a playlist. But still, the class thing didn’t appeal to me. I don’t like having to be somewhere at a designated time, or fight crowds, or talk and smile at people when the whole point is getting with myself; curling up inside my thoughts (or running away from them).
I hear this often: “Cougel, you would love Yoga!” and “You should try meditation!” and “Come to 8am Vinyasa!”
My response: “No thanks, not for me.”
They persist, “Okay, I know you don’t like to get up early. There’s a 6pm Kundalalalala class!”
“During happy hour?“ I say (no I don’t, but I think it).
And, “How about trying the bar class?
“I only frequent one kind of bar class.”
Yoga and meditation, Kabbalah and Buddhism, were often recommended to me when I was at the most lost and pivotal points in my life, like when I was in the throes of deciding whether to leave my ex-husband.
Psychics were suggested to me too. Astrologers. Tea leave and palm readers and phone conversations with anonymous women who could ease my burden by knowing my time of birth. Don’t get me wrong – I was tempted, and sometimes I still am. I do believe in the gift of sight, of intuition, and many friends of mine have been helped enormously via these types of spiritual advisors.
I would gather their information, and a few times, I even reached out, but when it came time to pull the trigger, I didn’t go through with it. Why? At first I thought it was because I was afraid of finding out something I didn’t want to know (Like the time when an Indian man at a midtown bar told me that he reads palms, looked at mine, then burst into tears of fear and sorrow.)
It’s because at the time I was still impressionable to others’ voices and expectations – and out of sync with my own. If I got a sneak peak into parts of my future, would it affect the choices I made now? Would I be reacting to that information, rather than just going with my gut?
And then – since I met my husband and reconnected with God, I realized that trust and faith in something bigger than myself is sufficient and steadfast guidance. Prayer is a form of meditation, and so is accepting that for me, getting answers or a quick fix from a gifted counselor doesn’t align with who I am. I had to, as my husband helped me realize, pray through it, practice, do the work, and trust that answers – often hidden – don’t immediately or plainly appear.
So maybe that’s the reason that guided meditation as a practice doesn’t appeal to me. Maybe it’s the reason it never did.
My friend recently recommended an App called “Headspace,” a digital platform for guided meditation and mindfulness. He swore that it would change my life – I could listen to it while I jogged in my new neighborhood, or on the subway to work. It would force me to bounce the noisy thoughts and clear my head, reconnect with myself, and relieve my stress. I enthusiastically downloaded the App on my phone and planned on trying it.
The next morning, when the hot sun streamed in through our curtainless windows and woke me up at 6:45am, my face and head baking from being shoved under a pillow all night, I decided to go for a jog in Riverside Park. My new backyard of miles and miles of green and water (without having to move to the suburbs). I had a long day of meetings and client outings ahead of me, and I knew that clearing my head would help arm me for it.
But I didn’t touch the mediation app. A calm, soothing voice can’t compete with Pat Benatar’s “Love is a Battlefield” or pissed off Linkin Park. I ran over three miles, the blue sky, the little boats, and people of all ages running or biking past me made me smile with joy, and by the time I got home, my headspace had been cleared.
Yes, I know that Yoga would be good for me, and I think there will come a time when I will turn that corner, try it, and realize that it’s the most amazing thing in the world – and write all about it. But right now, I’ve got a little block in the way. Could be timing, could be my aversion to following a pre-set instruction manual or teacher (which was never my bag), or resistance to learning something new. Or, it could just be me.
What type are you, and why? Are you the kind of person who relieves stress through mental and physical stillness, by slowing down, or does physical speed and exertion do it for you?
Exercise was never for me, even in my youth. I envy people who enjoy it and are disciplined enough to do it every day because I know how beneficial it is for good health, However, that knowledge was not enough to inspire me for very long. I enjoy activities like crafts, where I can sit still and take mental “vacations” from the stressful events in life. I may have tried yoga years ago, but now that even seems to be too much exertion for me lol Loved the blog!
Nina, I totally agree! When I have to choose between working out my mind or my body, the former always wins (sorry, health!). Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
I would love to work off stress through physical exercise. After several serious illnesses, my body doesn’t tolerate the vigorous kind. My body–and my brain responds to the slower meditative stuff like yin yoga, walking and rock climbing. I used to fight it but now I just embrace what my body wants.
I think that’s the key – knowing yourself and your body. Thanks so much for reading! xo
It’s not an either-or thing with me. I’m not inclined toward conquering the outdoors, but I do love BEING outdoors. I do love yoga and meditative activities, but I’m not one who wants to venture too far into the religious aspects of what I appreciate as a spiritual retreat. Oh! And like one of your previous commenters, I think it’s at once calming and exciting to create handcrafted gifts.
Ah hand crafted gifts…I love that idea. You know, I didn’t even touch on how writing is a form of meditation! My kind 🙂 Thanks so much for reading and commenting, Melodye!
I love how you phrased that question, Oritte. You know I’m the kind of exerciser who is all about movement, speed and exertion. But ironically, the reason I love mountain running is that it always leaves me feeling still. I hang on to the beauty and serenity and I feel calm even amidst all that exertion.
On a different note, that guy in the midtown bar sounds horrible! But I love the line, “I only frequent one kind of bar class.” ha!
Yes calm and serenity…running in the mountains sounds divine! It’s why I prefer the outdoors over a treadmill (shitty ny weather permitting!). And yeah, that guy at the bar was like a psychic terrorist.
Thank you for commenting! XO
I totally agree that these things call to you at *your* time, on your schedule, when you need or want them or are curious about them. I became curious about yoga and meditation a couple of years ago, and now love them, though still often fight them and also have my moments of metal default (as in, “Metallica”). We’re mixed bags, though, us humans. Like a spice cabinet. We know when to pull down a particular spice jar. And you do not put lavender in mac and cheese! (Unless you’re my husband. He really does put lavender in mac and cheese.)
Laura, you’re hilarious and insightful and I relish your comments! Thank you xo
great post. For me meditation is something I did for awhile but then I started Zentagle ing which is a drawing meditation. I don’t think I would ever do plain meditation again. But it was great for years. Interesting question and happy you’re jogging! Physical exercise is crucial to health I believe.
I find I need both activity and stillness at different times. Inconvenient times– often, I’d rather be doing what I’m not. Like I just want to kick back and relax when I’m at the gym, or I simply must get up and move around when I’m trying to write. I figure my body/mind is striving for some ideal, frequently elusive biochemical balance. As for the psychospiritual dimension, I believe anything we do with the intention of bringing greater peace love or understanding to ourselves and our world can be a form of prayer or a “working through” for answers; can in themselves be the answer. I agree with you– we each have to find our own way. Thanks for the stimulating read, Oritte!
YES! Any of these outlets can be a form of prayer, I agree. Thank YOU Nina for reading and commenting. So glad you found it thought provoking.